Im too lazy to write more in the story for now, plu sI kindof wonder if I can keep up funniness and any sort of plot line while doing weird 4th wall stuff all at the same time for too much longer anyway (or have i already failed at doing some/all of those? lol). So here is a random weird anecdote.

About antifreeze.

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I went to a gas station once at like 3 or 4 morning. Ok I do that a lot. But there was one particular time where it was really late and I went to get gas. And then I realized I needed antifreeze, so i figured I'd pick that up as well. I was in a super morbid mood, but I also felt kindof weird/silly at the same time. So I had this really odd idea. I didn't actually do it of course (as will become apparent my body's continued integrity), but I remember that the thought came to me particularly strongly, and that it reminded me just how strongly i value my own strangeness.

The thought came to me as i was paying for the antifreeze.

I thought- "You know, if i were really tired of being alive, I think i would pay for this antifreeze like I'm doing now, take two steps away from the cashier, open up the bottle...

And then drink it.

All of it.

Then i would wipe my mouth, say "AHHH" and walk out to die in a horribly painful fashion.

But it'd be worth it. Cuz I'd horribly mentally scar some random 7-11 clerk for no reason. Hey giving the finger to the world is cathartic, even for twisted weirdos.

You don't think so? Well fine. Go read some Vvonnegut. Any of his novels. Go ahead, do it.

I'll wait.